Author: Clifford Dow <cdowjr@...> Time: Thu Jan 3, 2002 5:26 pm PST Link
Once in a while I run into a good funny - had to share
this one with you all.
cliff dow jr
cdowjr@y...
THE NEW PRIEST
The new priest was so nervous at his first Mass that
he could hardly speak. Before his second appearance
in the pulpit, he asked the Monsignor how he could
relax. The Monsignor said, "Next Sunday, it may help
if you put some vodka in the water pitcher. After a
few sips everything should go smoothly." The next
Sunday the new priest put the suggestion into practice
and was able to talk up a storm. He felt great.
However, upon his returning to the rectory, he found a
note from the Monsignor.
It read:
1. Next time SIP, don't GULP.
2. There are ten commandments, not twelve.
3. There are twelve disciples not ten.
4. We don't refer to the cross as "THE BIG T."
5. The recommended grace before meals is not
"Rub-a-dub-dub thank God for the grub."
6. David slew Goliath, he didn't "beat the shit out of
him."
7. Don't refer to Jesus Christ and the apostles as
"J.C. and the boys."
8. The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit are not
"Big Daddy, Junior, and the Spook."
9. And last but not least, next Wednesday there is a
taffy-pulling contest at St. Peter's Church, not a
peter-pulling contest at St. Taffy's Church.
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